DWTS-Episode One Recap (and Introducing Becky!)

beckyFirst, I am happy to introduce you to Becky, my dear friend. While Becky has recently left the world of the single gal to enter the land of the married, for years she was a shining example of an independent, single woman. Strong minded, loyal, funny, self-aware, generous and never willing to sacrifice for less than she deserves. So, I am allowing her to remain an honorary member of the single club. Each Tuesday, she’ll be giving us a breakdown of that brilliant weekly entertainment show that crosses all womankind – Dancing With The Stars! And now, here’s the recap!


Welcome to my first official recap of DANCING!!!!  With the Stars!!!  I am still working on a format, so I promise that these will get nothing but better from this one forward.

(First, I want to assure all my new readers that I have watched all 12 seasons of DWTS from the beginning, and am fairly spot-on with judges scores before they actually give them out…..so yes….I like to think of myself as somewhat of an expert on the show. Now, let the games begin!)

Every season, Lisa and I give our pre-watching the show guesstimate of what order we think the stars will be going home.  This is based on a very scientific method of the following: of how much we like their professional partner, or think they are with a ho-bag, how old they are, if they will get sympathy votes, if they are an athlete/pop star and simply how well known they are.  Surprisingly….this method works 80% of the time and we are usually spot on, with 2 or so exceptions usually in the mid to lower section.   Below is mine for this season:

  1. Hope Solo
  2. Ricki Lake
  3. David Arquette :this is a HUGE crap shoot.  He could either be awesome or awesomely bad.  I guess we’ll see
  4. Chaz Bono :  ditto for this one
  5. JR Martinez
  6. Chynna Phillips
  7. Carson Kressley
  8. Elisabetta Canalis
  9. Kristin Cavallari
  10. Nancy Grace
  11. Ron Artest
  12. Rob Kardashian –he has a really good partner…but I think he is going to so bad.  He has no self-confidence.

Now that you know what I thought before I saw them dance, here is what I thought AFTER last night….

This Dude deserves to, and I pray will be going home tonight!

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Suuuure…..he may look like a good guy in this picture, but do NOT be deceived!  He is a DB in the highest manner (or at least that is how he came across last night.)  His new partner Peta is adorable, and hopefully she will not be discouraged by being stuck with this yahoo or being kicked off so easily.  This guy thinks he is just the bees knees, as soon as Bruno mentioned that he has long bones, his hands went straight to his ah hem area as if that was what Bruno meant.  He also just changed his name to World Peace and had some redic hair cut/design that said something we all couldn’t read!  All this is compounded on the fact that he is a horrible dancer with no rhythm and just looks awkward.  So I say, “Adios Ron, and don’t let your “long bones” trip you up on your way out!”  Their score: 14

 

 

Here is a short recap of the others:

Rob K and Cheryl:  He wasn’t as horrible as we thought he was going to be.  As Len said, “not impressed, but not depressed” about his dancing.  Score: 16

Kristen and Mark: I thought she did a lot of smiling and standing around, but the judges LOVE her!  She’ll go far.  Score: 19

Chynna and Tony:  What can I say?  Len LUVVVVS her!  She was pretty and did good, but I am holding out judgment until I see her do a Latin dance.  Score: 22

Nancy Grace and Tristan:  Lisa and I officially are in love with his Irish accent…..so let’s be honest…he can do no wrong.  Nancy was better than Rob, but not great.  I think the word I would use is : underwhelming.  Score: 16

David and Kym:  You can tell both the judges and America wants him to go far.  He is just plain endearing and a fairly good dancer!  He just needs to relax a little.  Score:  18

Elisabetta and Val:  Hmmm…what can I say about this one?  She has a smokin’ body for sure, which sort of makes me hate her, but is she a good dancer?  E had all the moves, but her heart wasn’t in it.  Maybe it was a language deal with her and Val, (Maks’ brother) or perhaps this is the way Italian models dance?  Who knows….but she is going to have to work a lot harder to stay in since I doubt she has a fan base!  Score:  15

Hope Solo and Maks:  I don’t know if you guys watched the woman’s World Cup this summer, but I did!  I love her!  Plus she is from Washington, so I am biased on this one.  She didn’t let me down, though!  She was great!  Since she is such an athlete she needs to refine her femininity a bit, but Maks said he would help her with that.  ummm…yes please!   Score: 21

Carson and Anna:  I have to admit…the thought of the two of them together made me scared for Carson since Anna is such a hard ass, but you know what?  I think he actually loosened her up and made her have fun!  She actually looked giddy up there.  Granted….not a good dancer, but he is having the time of his life out there and America LOVES that.  Just fun to watch!  Score:  17

JR and Karina:  While I didn’t love Karina’s dress, I am adoring JR.  What a charmer!  And my favorite quote of the night came from him, “I only have one ear, so I only hear half of the sentences you are saying to me!”   I mean, come on people….don’t tell me that all of America has a soft spot for this guy now?  To top it off…he was a GREAT dancer!  He’ll go far.  Score:  22

Derek and Ricki:  She was cute and lovely, and I think danced wonderfully.  Score:  20

Chaz and Lacy:  So of course they leave the most TV sensational couple for the end!  All of America wants to know….will he have the grace of his mother?  The showmanship of his father?  Or just completely suck.  Well America….I would say none of the above!  He didn’t suck, but wasn’t awesome either.  To ME it looked like he was completely off on his foot work and he kept touching his tummy which was distracting to me, but the judges LOVED him!  So this brings me to say…..do you REALLY think they did?  Or were they prompted by the producers to keep him on the show for ratings, a la Bristol Palin who was a bad dancer too?  Dun dun dunnn…..tell me below.  Score: 17

So who was your favorite?  Do you think Ron should go home or Rob?  All in all….I think it is going to be a great season full of interesting dancing and drama galore.

In closing I have a new FAVORITE OF ALL TIME TEAM NAME: Drickilous (which I will refer to Ricki and Derek from here on forward….and may even use in a sentence because I love it so much.  I mean…..that is so drickilous!

Until next week….

One thought on “DWTS-Episode One Recap (and Introducing Becky!)

  1. Pingback: It’s week 6, people. Did you hear me? Week 6! (DWTS Week Six Recap) | Modern Homemaker: Single Edition

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